September 26, 2017
Only a small number of couples decide to stay together after high school, and they usually do so braving a storm of doubtful, disapproving comments and statistics that only stack the odds against them.
If you had a serious relationship in high school, you are either still together and going to the same school, attempting long distance, or you’ve already broke up.
Your parents would probably appreciate the latter of those three decisions most.
Breaking up after high school in order to have a more ideal college experience is probably the piece of advice you heard most often during your senior year.
But it’s true. Most likely, if you maintained a high school relationship during college, you broke up or you will break up.
That doesn’t mean you were wrong about your significant other or your relationship, and it doesn’t always mean that you were wrong in your decision to stay together after high school.
I enrolled at UCCS to be closer to my high school sweetheart, and we broke up. But I’m still glad I made that decision, because I’ve found opportunities at UCCS and a life entirely my own here.
If you came to UCCS because of your significant other, or if you’re here trying to make a long-distance relationship work, that doesn’t mean you’ve ruined your life (and you can tell your mom I said that).
In fact, according to a 2015 NBC News article, 33 percent of college relationships are long distance.
If you’re among that percentage, it means that your ability to believe in love so strongly is a good thing.
Most of us come to college expecting parties, amazing experiences and a hopefully lucrative future career. Those aspects of the college experience important, but so are our relationships, our ability to be loyal and our ability to believe in something important to us when others may not.
Whether or not your high school sweetheart ends up being your life-long sweetheart, it’s not always a bad decision to prioritize the love you have for someone over other events in your life. We need more people in the world who value love.
That said, there are plenty of reasons you should not stay in your relationship transitioning from high school to college.
For one, your relationship should not be used to make the scary experience of transitioning into a new place with new people less scary.
If you’re afraid you won’t meet someone new, or that you won’t make friends at college, and your boyfriend or girlfriend is a safety net, you shouldn’t be stringing that person along as your safety net..
You are capable of being loved, even in ways other than the typical romance you are leaving behind in high school. You will make friends.
But if you were one of the people who truly believed that your relationship was real, genuine and deserving of trying to make it work after high school, a break up does not mean that all those things weren’t true.
Couples break up for many reasons.
That doesn’t necessarily mean you weren’t meant to be, or that you didn’t have an important and authentic relationship.
Break ups are hard, but your relationships are still worth the effort to give them a chance if that’s something you truly believe in.