Dick Clark joins the Mayans; now the world is definitely coming to an end

May 7, 2012

Peter Parker
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First Y2K, now the Mayan calendar. Whether involving the digital world of a new millennium or the prophetic inklings of a past empire, it’s tantalizing to consider situations that pose a threat to the survival of Earth. And it looks like we’re one step closer to seeing those ancient doomsday prophecies coming to a head.

American radio and television personality Richard Wagstaff “Dick” Clark died April 18 at the age of 82. Clark hosted several popular shows in his career, including “Pyramid” and “Dick Clark’s New Year’s Rockin’ Eve.” People are pointing to his death as a sign that the Mayans were right – the world will end this December, though not for reasons originally considered; instead, because Clark will be unable to usher in the New Year.

“It was bound to happen at some point,” said Sandra Plume, an art-history major at Las Mayans Universidad outside Los Angeles. “Clark was a phenomenal New Year-usher-inner, but we knew at some point we would have to become self-sufficient. And it looks like we failed at that, so the world is coming to an end.”

Some believe the evidence linking Clark and Mayans is too large to ignore.

“[Dick] was famous for his coverage of the New Year’s Eve celebrations in Times Square,” said Professor Eudin Mythlo from South America in a telephone interview Friday. “Little did we know, but the Mayan calendar actually references a ‘square of space where a whole year can pass without haste.'”

Mythlo believes the Mayans were referencing Times Square on New Year’s Eve, where we go from one second to the next and  from 2012 to 2013.
Others remain unconvinced.

“We’re still not entirely sure what’s going to happen come December,” historian Grayson Teller said. Teller specializes in mythology and thinks Clark and the Mayans are separate incidents.

“I don’t think they’re related, necessarily,” he said. “Besides, they Mayans have the end of the world pegged at Dec. 21, not midnight Dec. 31. If we’re still around on Dec. 22, I don’t think scrambling to find someone else to usher in 2013 is going to be a big deal.”

Tina Latecomer, an astronomer who dabbles in mythology and philosophy, believes that Clark leaving to join the Mayans this year is “particularly intriguing,” she said.

“There have been reports that instead of a crystal ball dropping this coming New Year’s, viewers will see a fiery ball of destruction fall to Earth. Looks like Dick got out of dodge just in time.”