Satire: Go to the lake on Friday the 13th, celebrate a stress-free weekend

October 10, 2017

Jason Voorhees

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    Oh, Friday the 13th. It’s my favorite day of the year. But I don’t think I had to tell you that.

    Everyone is so superstitious of this day. It’s just another Friday where you rejoice in the fact that your “perilous” work week is over, and you get to blow off two whole days doing meaningless activities to get you through the next “stressful” Monday.

    So what makes Friday the 13th any different?

    If you’re really so freaked out about stepping under a ladder, seeing a black and just being plain unlucky, you should do something to make yourself feel better.

    Stop complaining, and come to Camp Crystal Lake in Crystal Lake, New Jersey for a fun weekend away.

    Camp Crystal Lake is a gorgeous, rustic wooded area in the middle of an east cost paradise.

    I might be biased, but this place has everything: private cabins, great food and a beautiful lake that’s welcoming in a totally-safe-there’s-not-a-serial-killer-hiding-underwater kind of way.

    Learn the ways of rustic life at our camp. Hike, forage for food and go for a paddle on the lake. There are also plenty of exercise opportunities as we have various trails to escape.. sorry, explore, your time in New Jersy.

    I can promise you that it’s a trip you’ll never forget.